I had an emergency appointment with my dietitian yesterday. I needed to see her because I've been feeling totally out of control with food; B/Ping way too much. I always regret B/Ping and it makes me feel awful afterwards, but beforehand it always sounds like such a good idea. It doesn't just sound like a good idea - it sounds like a GOOD idea. I'm serious - before bingeing, I literally think, Wow, I have the urge to binge, I'm a genius for thinking of this, I know it will make me feel better - let's do it! It's so easy for me to forget how utterly horrible I feel afterwards. I think: this time will be different. But it never is.
So I saw J to get some ideas of how to stop myself from bingeing even when I think it's a good idea. It's really hard for me to prevent myself from bingeing when it literally sounds like a good idea every time. She said we should make a behavior chain. A behavior chain is three activities that you do in a certain order (the same order every time) before you binge (or before whatever behavior you are trying to not do). The idea is that when you feel the slightest urge to binge, you have to make yourself do these three activities first. Hopefully the behavior chain will prevent you from bingeing, but you always have the option of bingeing afterwards if you still want to.
Here is my behavior chain if I feel the urge to binge:
1. Watch TV for 30 minutes.
2. Paint my nails - apply two coats.
3. Go on the internet for 15 minutes.
I signed a contract saying I will follow my behavior chain before I binge. I'm feeling really hopeful about this.
9 comments:
those sound like really great ideas- and i bet it's hard to binge with wet fingernail polish!
keep us posted and let us know how it goes!
This is the best thing I've read in forever! I'm going to make my own chain like right now! Good luck and thank you!!!
Wow, that does sound like an excellent idea. I like it and am kind of surprised I've never heard of it before. Hopefully you find it helpful- I know the regret after giving into ED behaviors all too well.
Great idea, seriously! And I bet if you find a trashy-enough television show, it will distract you for hours :) That is how I do it anyways!
I am proud of you for tackling this - you are taking steps in the right direction and that is all you can ask of yourself.
xoxo
Sounds good, especially painting your nails! You can do it. Good luck. You should blog when you feel the urge.
I totally had to do this at CFC with Dr. Julie. She called them intervention and I have to complete 3 out of the 6 I came up with before I want to restrict or purge. She highly recommended that one be a social intervention and one be a spiritual intervention. Good luck! I really think if you truly follow through with them it will help tremendously. Also maybe you could come up with what Dr. J calls restitutions. For example if you purge, you have to boost. I understand that you wouldn't drink enough boost to count for all of your binge but maybe just one can. That way your eating disorder doesn't get a payoff. Or you can say that if you B/P then you have to repeat 20 affirmations to yourself in the mirror. I am proud of you for taking steps to recover. I know you have the skills to do it.
Krista that's a cool idea! I like the idea of restitutions and having a range of activities for interventions...
Kara, how are you going with the behaviour chain???
How are you holding up after all the other news of late?
Thinking of you hunni
xoxo
I'm just catching up. Sorry I have not been around.
I'm sorry about getting wait listed. I know it isn't much consolation, but maybe you just weren't meant for it. There's going to be something super amazing that comes along and you will get it.
I'm glad that you have this plan down! Good luck with it! I know that you can do it! :)
love, kristin
Painting your nails is absolutely brilliant. Why didn't I think of this?
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