I was sitting in church yesterday and I thought that need to get my life together. I need to start actively pursuing my dream of getting a PsyD. So I just signed up for a GRE prep course that starts on Wednesday (nothing like doing things last minute, ha). I'm scared, but I know it's going to be a good thing. I get so scared about my future. It's like I want certain things to happen in my life so badly that it hurts - but I'm so paranoid that I'm going to fail and screw everything up and be miserable forever. So instead of doing everything I can to make it happen, I do nothing. Absolutely nothing. Because I'm too scared. But now I'm taking a deep breath and taking baby steps. First step: the GRE prep course. I can do this!
[Edit: It's a few hours later and I'm FREAKING OUT that I just enrolled in a GRE prep class. I'm totally second guessing myself. I'm so scared I'm not going to be able to handle it. Aaaah!!!!!!!!!!!! Deep breath. Deep breath. ]
11 comments:
Hell yes you can! Way to be! I have full faith in your abilities, particularly because the dream you have is something you feel really passionate about- you've been on the other end so you are driven more than most to get there. KU-DOS!
Yeah Kara! I seriously need to be thinking my my future as well. Such a hard prospect sometimes, but you are doing baby steps and that's a great thing.
I totally identify with the all or nothing thinking... and I have freaked myself out on many occassions by second guessing myself. Something that helps me is reminding me that EVERY experience is a learning experience, whether or not it is the thing that ends up becoming my future. And it gives you more options. I was freaked out about applying to grad school, until I realized (with the help of a trained professional) that applying to grad school, or even attending, does not lock me in to one predetermined future. Plans change, people change, and you can gain valuable knowledge no matter which path your life ends up taking. Good luck witht the class! :)
Kara, I am proud that you signed up for the course. Signing up for the course does NOT mean that you have to ace the GRE or the you even have to take the dang test. This is a step towards a future that you want. It's just a step, not the deciding factor. You can do it.
I have the same kinds of fears about failing as you do. I am so scared of doing my overdue homework assignments that I don't do them despite the fact that I eventually will have to. I'm glad to hear that even with your fears that you enrolled in this prep course. That is a really good first step.
You can do it!
your friend, kristin
Woot for the GRE prep course! I'll just second all the other brilliant comment leavers. This is a great first step.
Like YOU told me the other day (uhumm!)don't pysch yourself out with the huge task ahead...just work at it bit by bit, be kind to yourself, and let things come together. Know that you are now doing something to reach your dreams--be proud of this and yourself, cause you ARE going to make it.
And if it's not the right thing for you after all, then that's okay too. You will have TRIED. And that is what living life is all about!! :)
Random: I think starting up an exercise routine is going to help me mentally (and physically). I've been having serious motivation problems lately, so I'm going to commit to you here and now that I'm going to work out at the gym today. Hold me to it.
I think this will be god for you, it will give you something else to focus on.
You are absolutely capable of doing well on the GRE. It's a good step.
SO how was your gym workout today??!!
Going to the gym (although I suffer from servere motivation issues as well) helps improve my whole state of being. And I find that once I get into a routine, I generally am able to stick with it. The problem is when I have ditched the routine, it's hard to find that INITIAL motivation to start back again. I'm just making myself do it now until I surpass that hard first stage. GOOD LUCK!!!!! You'll feel GREAT!!
I think the GRE prep course will be fine. And this is coming from someone who just recently took it. It can certainly seem overwhelming, but you only have to do as much as you can. There were people in my class who didn't participate at all. It's up to you.
Plus, I have to admit that I STILL have not taken the actual GRE. I also have a failure complex. I kept feeling like I wasn't ready because I knew I wasn't going to get the quantitative score I wanted. Once I finish my French class, it's time to get back on the wagon and study some more, and actually take it.
My parents said they would take me down to Columbia this spring to visit the school and speak with admissions, so I think that's going to be a good motivator. Do you have something really lighting a fire under you?
xx
Nikki
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