My first thought after hearing this news was to check my e-mail. Maybe Dr. K wrote me a quick e-mail apologizing for not coming in today (she knows how much I needed to talk to her). But of course, silly me for thinking she would e-mail me - no e-mail in the inbox. But what I did see when I opened my Gmail account is probably what I needed to hear, much to my dislike. JB's status is: it call comes down to you. How true is that? Sure, I really needed to see Dr. K today, but I am capable of making it on my own (even though I don't want to, I'd much rather rely on Dr. K).
I'm still upset that I won't be able to see Dr. K today, but after seeing JB's status, I'm not going to binge or cut like I was planning on doing upon hearing the news.
Remember, in the end...
It all comes down to YOU.
[Edit: It's now 6 hours later and I've been crying non-stop since 8am. I don't know why this is affecting me so much. Probably because the cancellation caught me by surprise (she has never cancelled before) and I felt like the rug was pulled out from under me. I'm sure it has also triggered some sort of deep-seeded issues with abandonment. Anyway, I decided that I couldn't do it by myself, so I called the office and had Dr. K call me. She just called and I feel a little better now. I think I got all the crying out of my system. Even though it all comes down to you, sometimes you just need a little extra help.]
7 comments:
therapists should not be allowed to be sick!
oh, yes, I really hate when they go on vacation or take a day off or get sick. haha.
Sorry Dr. K was sick but maybe it was a blessing in disguise because it allowed you to realize you can do this with just you. You are your own caretaker and you can get through the rest of the week.
You are really inspiring/motivating to me - and I need some motivation right now so thank you!
And to think that a quote from a Fleetwood Mac song could have this impact! I am glad I was able to help!
I have been listening to the song "Gypsy" a lot and that line just struck a chord with me. It seemed so fitting for the things I've been seeing my friends (& sister) go through lately. Plus I should definitely apply it to myself!
:)
*Internet hug*
It DOES seem like psychologists and therapists inconveniently get sick or go on vacation. I choose to ignore the fact that clinicians are indeed people, too, and get sick. I have this odd fantasy in my head that they're practically superhuman. Although it does come down to you, it's always good to get a second opinion and someone else's advice.
I can't believe your dad says things like that?! Seriously!!! That makes me all nervous just reading it! Sheesh.
I hate cancellations. Every time my t cancels on me, I become so upset and cry. Ts always seem to cancel when you really need them. Yuck! I'm so sorry that Dr. K was sick today. :(
I hope you're still feeling better.
love, kristin
Ooh lovely Kara!
I really liked this post! I had a situation last week where I actually RANG my T (I usually email and hope its enough for me just getting outta my system) but I really wanted/needed to speak and HOPEFULLY see her... and she was SICK!! ARGH! So I get where you're at, it always seems to be the worst timing.
But what I loved so much about wha tyou wrote is that, yes we CAN do it on our own, but sometimes we DO need a little help and its okay to reach out and get that. So very wise and useful :).
Glad you rang her and glad she was able to help. Also glad that you DID try to manage on your own which I think is a really good mix of strength and knowing when you need that extra bit of assistance.
Very cool xo
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